Well meaning

People in general really do want to say the right thing and do the right thing.  I really believe that!  And, I've said before, people will step up to love you and care for you when you really need to be loved!  I've seen this in action in the last seven weeks

What I also see is that now that it's been SEVEN WHOLE WEEKS, people are expecting something different when they deal with us.  Generally people who have lost their spouse or parent don't say anything but people who have maybe never dealt with this have rather high expectations when talking to us (My Mom, siblings) about "moving on". 

I think my Mom has heard the worst of it from others.  She's been told to "just cheer up" and to "take a walk" when she feels sad.  Her boss actually asked her if it's really that hard.  Umm, yeah, it's really that hard.  The boss aside, most people are well meaning, they just don't get it. There is no way or reason to explain it really.  When you lose someone you love it hurts.  Sometimes that hurt goes on for a while.  Some people are better equipped to deal with the pain than others. 

My Mom and I have said several times that now we know how it feels and it will change how we react to others when they go through this.  There is no way to prepare yourself for something that hurts so much and there is no way to explain to other people how deep the pain is.  It's another of life's frustrations.